morning day 7

Good morning. Today is day 7.

Day 6 was wonderful and inspiring. So much better than day 5!

The morning started with a close friend visiting irl and two vdear friends from seattle. Its tough managing both conversations at once, but we all chatted a bit over breakfast.

In the afternoon, Pyewacket, Stelarc’s builder in Second Life, invited me over to see Stelarc’s gallery. That was exactly what I needed. It was so inspiring, it was really the fuel I needed to do the second half of this performance. Pyewacket works closely with stelarc and told me a few valuable thing. She says that he is all about persistence, and that when there are technical difficulties he just sighs and goes on. That was very reassuring, because there have been so many technical difficulties throughout this process of Becoming Dragon, and usually I just try to be patient and push through.

She also said that Stelarc’s like is one big technical difficulty, which is exactly how I’m feeling about my Life/Second Life right now. Just seeing all of Stelarc’s amazing work with the third arm and ping body, looking closely at the diagrams and photos was wonderful. The third ear portion of the gallery may be the most interesting though, as you can have your avatar lay down on the table and get surgery too, just like Stelarc.

Later J and Corina came over and brought a nice dinner and my dog annie. It was so great to see my friends, have some really good food and to play with my dog. She felt so soft, the tactile stimulation I need. She also has such a familiar smell, its very comforting.

While I was showing them around the Nameless Isle and Chakryn Forest, Angelbeast signed on. She invited us to yet another S&M dungeon which my RL visitors wanted to see. So, we went there and walked around for a bit. Its interesting how the Dragon avatar doesn’t fir the human animations, so using them is just hilarious. But it also in a way short circuits the play by highlighting its limits.

Interestingly enough, a few people at the dungeon, more like a sex club, were fascinated by the appearance of a dragon. One person with a catwoman like appearance and movements kept saying provocative things. To humor her, I did some more pole dancing. Apparently all this attention for the dragon was too much for the bouncer with his tribal tattoos, sunglasses and nipple rings. He promptly ejected me from the club after just a short while of play and so so much laughter.

Back in my lab, I learned that another of my regular visitors has a partner who is transgender, and that she lives in Louisiana, which they said is a hard place for her to be. It still continues to surprise me how many trans people and trans allies and lovers have come to visit me. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised any longer.

Before going to bed, I saw an old friend from Midian City. She is currently doing Second Life escorting as well as running an SL escort business. She said that she’s frustrated because she wanted to explore empowerment and sexuality but ends up often telling girls they’re not working hard enough or giving blow jobs to 20 year olds. She told me, as another person did, that she had almost given up on coming to Second Life, as she doesn’t like pretending, she’s pragmatic she says.

I showed her Chakryn Forest and we had an interesting and long conversation about relationships, monogamy and nonmonogamy, identity and whether there’s a true self that can be uncovered and healed or it is just chemical processes and recurrent behavior patterns.

I also had two interesting moments yesterday. This friend from Midian, jackie, I ran into her for a bit earlier in the day and after telling her about my project we started talking about Jungian dream analysis and childhood memories. At that moment, we were standing on the nameless isle, and I remembered that the first poem I remember writing, at I think 12 years old, was about white waves crashing on black rocks, juts what the nameless isle looks like. A common image, but not to a child in Miami, Florida. Again later with my friends over dinner, I showed them the transgender lounge and recalled that as a teenager I imagined a place with red fall leaves and a running river to relax by, exactly what the tg lounge looks like. Perhaps its just coincidence, or better yet, perhaps those are common images of places that people might find relaxing, so others have created those spaces for relaxing in.

Today I’ve been stretching a bit. Pye suggested that I figure out some stretches that work with the visor and gear on, which was a great idea. For my time in the morning brushing my teeth and going to the bathroom, though, its becoming increasingly hard to see at a distance, and that makes my stomach feel not so hot. Apparently I’ve gotten to this point where its easier being in the visor, because now I feel better. A marker of the halfway point, maybe.


1 Response to “morning day 7”

  1. 1 j
    December 8, 2008 at 4:47 am

    whoa, how amazing are all those conversations and breakthroughs. perhaps not breakthroughs maybe more affirmations. i’m not sure that is more for you to know. it is very stimulating and engaging to follow your performance and to be involved how i can. there are 9 more days left. i wonder what these will bring you. its good so see you stretching and being aware of your body. you know your limits.

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